The Brain Chemistry of Depression in Relationships


As a consulting hypnotist, I have had countless men and women come to me for the purpose of helping them to manage their stress and depression within relationships. Whether working with a man or a woman, it’s always best to start from ground zero. It all comes down to brain chemistry, so educating clients is the first step.

The reason is simple. In the absence of gender brain chemistry knowledge, understanding one’s actions and reactions in a relationship is difficult. The human body truly is an amazing organism. When it is well cared for, it will perform with utmost precision. When the body is neglected, the result is “dis” ease. Disease surfaces in many forms, mostly physical. Make no mistake, emotional or psychological disease is equally, if not more, debilitating.

The human stress response cycle is a finely tuned mechanism most people know nothing about. That is one of the reasons I developed Gender Brain Chemistry™. One of the most debilitating psychological effects of failure to understand and maintain brain chemistry equilibrium is depression.

Depression, Anxiety, Phobias, and Panic Attacks

The focus here is depression, but depression can be the result of anxiety, fears or phobias, and can lead to panic attacks. In its severest form, one can find themselves a prisoner in their own home. Too fatigued to get out of bed, poor nutrition, and feeling overwhelmed can consume you.

This was the case with Sandy, a 55 year old woman who was in my classes. Sandy was severely depressed as the result of life trials and tribulations. For the most part, it was her brain chemistry imbalance that created problems. She worked as a nurse and had a vague understanding of oxytocin and serotonin.

Sandy knew about administering oxytocin to a pregnant female patient to induce labor. What she didn’t know was oxytocin and serotonin play a major role in reducing everyday stress. She only knew serotonin was a mood stabilizing neurotransmitter that promoted calmness, nothing more.

Understanding Imbalance

Sandy had been married two years before I started working with her. Her husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer, which was a major stress for her. This led to her feelings of depression, feeling overwhelmed by finances, and ultimately a loss of interest in her marriage.

She expressed, “It’s useless to try making my marriage work. We don’t talk and I don’t think he respects me.” As it turned out, Sandy rekindled a romance with a former lover. In fact, she was seeing several men on a pretty regular basis. Along with her moodiness, poor sleeping habits, and irritability, it was easy for me to develop a profile of her brain chemistry.

In terms of gender chemistry, a female’s work is ongoing. Like the energizer bunny, tireless and driven to meet their chemistry needs. Sandy’s brain chemistry was severely imbalanced. The symptoms she presented and the behaviors she was involved in were indications her oxytocin and serotonin levels were quite low.

Stress depletes oxytocin and causes the adrenal glands to secrete cortisol, a stress hormone. This could explain some of her moodiness and depression. Often the result is adrenal fatigue, which overstresses the body and mind, and disease results.

Sandy just wanted to feel better, so she found others to talk to and care about, her body’s attempt at achieving chemistry balance. New friends, old connections, and infidelity are all about people and relationships. Bonding is the essence of oxytocin. Sandy did not feel respected and understood, which also depleted her oxytocin.

I explained to Sandy, serotonin is nature’s antidepressant. With low serotonin, you feel overwhelmed, depressed, that nothing is going right, and crave relationship interactions (esp. a listener). It was Sandy’s lack of brain chemistry knowledge and how to manage it that contributed to her depression.

Sleep disturbances, a lack of passion or interest in everyday life situations, an unwillingness to make a relationship work, chronic fatigue, an unwillingness to talk, with a feeling of “what’s the use?” Suddenly, Sandy began to not only see, but understand gender chemistry. She began to feel empowered to overcome her depression.

Sadly, her marriage did not survive. I did have the opportunity to meet with Joe, Sandy’s ex-husband. He became a student of Gender Brain Science™ and is in the process of becoming a gender brain chemistry expert. He saw that his lack of knowledge of this information contributed to the problems in the marriage and doesn’t want that to happen again.

Nothing in this program is meant to be considered medical, psychological or nutritional advice. Contact those professionals for that type of advice. I do not diagnose nor treat psychological disorders. I am not a licensed practitioner, rather I am a Certified Consulting Hypnotist. This information and training contains only educational content for wellness. If you are under 18, you must have your parent or guardian approval to be in the class. If you are in an urgent situation, call 911 or call the Suicide Hotline at 800-273-8255, which is available 24/7 and is free.